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CAVEPERSON DIET GOOD: ELECTION RESULTS BAD

23/9/2014

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The greatest risk of eating as much fat as you fancy  - and feeling so well -  is that you become a food bore. 
I've even been boring myself  droning on about what I’m eating and not eating. I used to be scathing about picky eaters, but now  I'm the one staring gloomily into carb-laden cafe food cabinets, or poring suspiciously over the fine print on food labels.  Vegetarians, vegans, the gluten intolerant and those of you with food allergies … please accept my apologies. 
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At the Election Cafe on Saturday night, Head Chef John Key, aided by his sous chefs Judith, Cameron and Jason amongst others, served the country a plate of dirty politics fried in whale oil. This poisonous concoction, served on filthy plates covered in greasy fingerprints should have been one of the least appealing choices on the menu but we lapped it up. We should have seen red. But no, we turned around and handed New Zealand to the National Party on a silver platter. It’s no use crying over spilt milk, but on Saturday night I felt like crying. If I hadn’t been into my third week of eating a diet heavy on saturated fats and light on carbohydrates I might have felt much, much worse. 

As it was, there was only some sautéed pork belly and vegetables standing between me and the likely onset of a persistent depressive episode. More about the pork belly later, but first a bit of context. 


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I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR - EATING LIKE A CAVE WOMAN

9/9/2014

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Thankfully proponents of the Paleo Diet aren't suggesting we abandon the supermarket for the Savannah.
At age 12, I knocked out two of my hockey coach’s front teeth with a single swipe of a hockey stick so I may have a latent talent for bludgeoning small, slow-moving animals to death. I just wouldn't want to stake my survival on it.  
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This week I am going to be digging my grave with my teeth. 

Or, just possibly, I am going to be eating food which will miraculously improve my health by reducing inflammation, stabilising my blood sugar levels, improving my mood and sleep, and give me better teeth and clearer skin into the bargain. 

Yes folks, I am joining the Clan of the Cave Person and eating a (liberal) version of the Paleo Diet, known in some circles as a low carb/high protein diet. This will involve eating large amounts of saturated fats (including butter, cream and cheese), meat, fish, leafy greens and a few nuts and seeds. I am turning my back on the poly-unsaturated fats, fruits and whole-grains so beloved of the New Zealand Heart Foundation. 

In a nutshell, the Paleo diet is restricted to the types of food eaten by hunter-gatherers of the Palaeolithic area. The advocates of the diet do not suggest that we abandon the supermarket for the savannah, but they do suggest that modern man and woman would be healthier eating only the foods which our distant forebears gathered and hunted: meat, nuts and berries.  They argue that as soon as our cave-dwelling ancestors began growing and consuming grains their health deteriorated. Humans got shorter and had more tooth decay. 


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    THE GREY URBANIST
    Ro Cambridge, is a freelance writer, 
    arts worker & columnist Here she reports on the oddities & serendipities of  urban life.  She roams Nelson city , NZ 
    with a tan & white Jack Russell. (Her original canine side-kick, Pete, who features in many of these posts died in 2015.

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